Django Durango

This post contains affiliate links so that, if you buy these things through these links, I get a little dosh for showing you how to alter your DDR mats so you don’t slip, fall, and die like an old lady.

So me and Simon recently got back into Guitar Hero and we decided to get back into DDR while we were at it. I still had my favorite DDR game, Dance Dance Revolution Extreme 2, but we needed new mats to play it.

I did a lot of research on them and basically found that unless you were willing to shell out a few hundred for a metal mat, your home options are pretty shit. You either get the fold up mats which bunch up when you get too furious in the feets or you get the kind with foam inside, but the buttons are less responsive because the backing is less solid. On top of this, we have hardwood floors in my apartment so slippage was going to be an issue with either mat, but I was leaning toward the foam-insert ones since I knew we’d also need some impact cushioning. We get achy feet after only a few Guitar Hero songs worth of just standing on these floors, so I knew actually dancing was going to hurt too.

However, the foam ones are a bit more expensive and I didn’t want to pay a lot in case we ended up not being as into it as adults (see: the time we went to a roller skating rink and I fell multiple times, hurting my old lady knees and elbows). So I bought two of the fold-up kind that I had as a kid and came up with a plan to improve them.

I am so fuckin’ excited to tell you about this because honestly, I thought this was gonna end up being some hackneyed plan that only kinda worked, but holy shit. When I was done with them, these mats did. not. move. When Simon saw how well this plan worked, he hugged and kissed me because what a glorious gift it is to be engaged to a woman as brilliant as me.

Read on…

The following post includes affiliate links to products on amazon.com. If you buy these things via these links, I get a commission at no additional cost to you. They haven’t sent me any of these things for free, nor have they asked me to write about these products. I just figured if I send them business, I may as well get compensated for it.

For my birthday a few months ago, my boyfriend Simon bought me a pair of these Cat Ear Headphones (Update (12/7/17): now there’s an improved and upgraded wireless version that changes colors and supposedly has fewer wiring issues). Not only do they feature the pointy cat ears, but they also light up and can be used as speakers in order to share one’s music; or in my case inflict it on others. They are incredibly novel and also incredibly expensive. So it was incredibly harrumphing that they do not work as expected straight out of the box.

I mean, they work just fine as headphones so I’m not exactly crying false advertisement. And I suppose technically they could be used for gaming, if that game were on a cellphone or possibly the Nintendo DS. Because the headset uses a 4-pin jack, which combines the headphones and the mic into a single cable, you can’t use it with most PC’s which have separate jacks for audio and mic. I am to understand that the current generation of gaming consoles are compatible with the 4-pin jack, but it leaves us last-gen plebians with our dicks hangin’ out.

Nonetheless, it is possible to make these headphones interface with both the PC and the PlayStation 3. It requires more equipment, sure, but for some it is a worthwhile endeavor.

Read on…

All right, nerds. I’mma have to be real with you.

You need to stop with the packaged action figures. It’s sending all the wrong signals.

I see a lot of “nerd” rooms that have action figures, still in their boxes, on display like they were cherished tchotchkes. It is my assumption that aside from declaring loudly and proudly that you like nerdy shit, the intention behind this is to convey a sense of fun and childlike whimsy to your visitors. Because who but a fun person would collect Legends of the WWF toys or obscure DC superhero action figures?

But “fun” is not what piles upon piles of toys you cannot play with suggests.

Read on…

So maybe you, like me, are interested in making an item for Team Fortress 2. And maybe you’re new to modelling so you want to look at TF2 models in, say, Blender (though this will get you far enough if you’re using something else). With the new SteamPipe content distribution system, though, shit’s all hidden and confusing now ’cause they converted all the .gcf files into .vpk’s. Even if you’ve extracted stuff from TF2 before, maybe you’re having a hard time now. All the tutorials for how to do this are outdated and I can’t be the only dumbass who couldn’t figure this out in two minutes, so I am gonna put this here for anyone who needs it.

Read on…

So what do you do if you have a virus?

I work at a computer shop, you know. And it may surprise and delight you to know that everything we use to remove viruses at work is absolutely free for you to obtain and use too. Don’t worry. Virii removal is not our bread and butter, and if one were to Google it, they could very come upon these things themselves. What I’m giving here is the 90% tried and true procedure we use at my office.
Read on…