Oh, I got you this time
\nAgent White!
\nAnd Boy oh boy
\nAre you gonna feel
\nLike a dipshit after this one!
\n
\nThere\u2019s no way
\nThis plan could fail!
\nIt\u2019s fool-proof
\nHas to be!
\nI read it in a book<\/p>\n
I have all I need
\nUp here with me
\nIn this tree
\nOutside your embassy<\/p>\n
When you leave your embassy
\nAnd pass by me in the tree
\nI\u2019ll drop the quarter
\nAnd it\u2019s a good thing
\nIt\u2019s sunny today
\nThe quarter is shiny
\nIt\u2019ll catch your eye
\nAnd when you stop to pick it up
\nI\u2019ll drill a hole through your hat
\nWith my cordless drill<\/p>\n
Then I\u2019ll drop the acorn
\nA small, green diversion
\nYou\u2019ll stop, of course, to see
\nIf another quarter has fallen
\nFrom the sky
\nHa! That\u2019s when I\u2019ll pour
\nThe catsup
\nThe cheap runny kind
\nToo much tomato juice
\nNot enough tomato paste
\nNot much good for anything
\nExcept to look like blood<\/p>\n
I\u2019ll pour the catsup
\nDown from the hole
\nTo the brim of your hat<\/p>\n
By then, you\u2019ll be walking again
\nI\u2019ll strike a match and light
\nThe firecracker
\nIt\u2019ll explode and go CRACK!!!
\nTo me it won\u2019t sound
\nMuch like gunfire
\nBut to you,
\nYou with your secret plans on hand,
\nYou\u2019ll be paranoid
\nAnd sure of it<\/p>\n
And that\u2019s when you\u2019ll come
\nUpon the mirror I\u2019ve hung
\nFrom the end of this branch<\/p>\n
And see the \u201cblood\u201d
\nLeaking from your hat
\nAnd dripping down your
\nPale, pointy nose
\nAnd you
\nYou\u2019ll be too concerned
\nWith your supposed
\nWound to wonder
\nWhy there\u2019 s a mirror
\nHanging from the branch
\nAnd you\u2019ll sure I shot you!
\nAnd had perfect aim
\nWhich won\u2019t be entirely incorrect<\/p>\n
You\u2019ll think you\u2019ve died!
\nDied!
\nAnd knowing you
\nAgent White
\nActor Extraordinaire
\nYou\u2019ll put on a big death scene
\nWorthy of a Shakespearean tragedy
\nComplete with your last words
\nLast breath
\nDeath rattle
\nAnd all that happy crappy<\/p>\n
Then as you lay on the grass
\nIn the shade under the tree
\nThinking you\u2019re dead
\nI\u2019ll steal away with your
\nTOP SECRET plans
\nHa ha ha!!!<\/p>\n
Oh\u2026 but I know better
\nThis is only gonna work once
\nJust like all the traps
\nOnly work once
\nYou and I
\nWe\u2019re both too smart
\nTo fall for anything
\nThis damn stupid
\nMore than once<\/p>\n
But dammit!
\nYou\u2019ll have to admit
\nIt was a pretty good plan
\nWhen you realize you\u2019re not dead
\nYet, of course<\/p>\n
So here I sit
\nIn this tree
\nWaiting for you
\nTo leave
\nThe embassy<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Oh, I got you this time Agent White! And Boy oh boy Are you gonna feel Like a dipshit after this one!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[166],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-327","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poetry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/djangodurango.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/327","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/djangodurango.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/djangodurango.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/djangodurango.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/djangodurango.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=327"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/djangodurango.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/327\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2599,"href":"https:\/\/djangodurango.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/327\/revisions\/2599"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/djangodurango.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=327"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/djangodurango.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=327"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/djangodurango.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=327"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}